You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
She asked how many sexual partners I'd had and I was like "Honestly I don't even know". And then she said "well last time you said 8." And my inner monologue busted out laughing and I was like "Oh I'd say like 11 or 12.....plus 20."
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
