I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
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