his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
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