She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
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