just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
I'm bleeding and have questions
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
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