Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Randomize
