I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
Holy shit dude........stairs
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