I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
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