you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
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