Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
Randomize
