A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
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