Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Randomize
