Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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