He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize
