Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
Randomize
