I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
At the doctor. They're doing a flu test now. He was like "where do you think you got this?" I said "bachelor party. Strippers." he goes "okaaaay I'll put 'other'."
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life