Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
You're my little dorito
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
Randomize
