we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
You were spooning an empty magnum of white wine in the middle of the bed so I slept on the couch
Well at least there's no more confusion about your place in my life. Wine > pizza > your dick > the rest of you.
Love you...
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
Randomize
