idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
