wakey wakey hands off snakey
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
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