when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
Who died my cat blue again?
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
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