I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Randomize
