brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
Randomize
