Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
Randomize
