apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
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