Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize
