I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
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