you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
25 Facts Men Don’t Know About Women Until They Live Together
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
These 19 People Imagine Others When Banging Their SO
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.