but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
