after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
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