Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
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