I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
I TAUGHT HER CAT TO SIT. CATS DON'T FUCKING SIT ON COMMAND. BUT THIS ONE DID!
It's basically my crowning achievement.
Randomize