Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
