Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
Randomize
