walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
Randomize
