is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
The beers last night were like the tears from god
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
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