We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Banjos are just sex machines. Like lights to moths, banjos are to hipster bitches.
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
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