3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
Please stop calling me a pterodactyl during sex. It only happens when you're drunk, but still.
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