69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
I am unfriending an ex-one night stand because his profile picture is of his wife's ultrasound.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
Randomize