Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(305): View more from Florida

nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs

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(860): View more from Connecticut

New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache

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(201): View more from New Jersey

You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"

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(802): View more from Vermont

Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.

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23 Men Confess The Moment They Realized They Wanted A Divorce
Read it at the TFLN blog
(763): View more from Minnesota

i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover

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(630): View more from Illinois

It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table

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(540): View more from Virginia

My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.

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(440): View more from Ohio

I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.

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(573): View more from Missouri

Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.

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