Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
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