Nothings more american than taking a shit with a handgun next to you.
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
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