Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
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