Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Randomize
