I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
