Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Randomize
