If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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