he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize
