im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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