So drunk, too bad you don't want this
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
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